Dionysius and Drinking

Cheers–*hiccup*–, mortals! I am the god Dionysius.

I am the god of wine, drunken–*hiccup*–revelries, youthful orgies, and ecstatic madness. I am perhaps the oldest, best-known, and most worshipped deity of the ancient world--with cults honoring me from the fiercely independent Greek city-states and islands to Egypt and stretching throughout Mesopotamia to even the Far East regions. Why am I so popular? Fool, it is quite simple–*hiccup*–I'm a party god! I do not require mortals to worship me directly, but to revere the divine vine and the barley harvest. I make mortals feel good about their existence, even if they lead miserable, down-trodden lives. A small cup or glass or mere shot of alcohol always serves to wake up the senses and loosen the morals, even of the most strictest of dullards.

Pentheus was not aware of the power of potent potables. My ardent followers, the Maenads, a bunch of wildly intoxicated women, tore poor Pentheus to pieces for attempting to impose order and ban drinking. Ban–*hiccup*–drinking? The insolence! Did not the gods provide the ingredients from Demeter's garden so that meager man may concoct a spirited liquid to free himself of mortality, even for a moment? To drink is to escape from the ache of laborious work, from the pain of lost love or no love at all, from the hopelessness of a desperate situation, and even from the sting of life itself. So why ban it? There is no reason to keep such sweet–*hiccup*–nectar from the lips of humans who seek the ecstatic and orgiastic revelry that I am so famous for. Let men and women rejoice! For I am–*hiccup*–Dionysius and I offer you this drink!

Come now, mortals, let us review three local drinks that are favorites among the Greeks.

Ouzo
Ouzo is Greek, make no mistake about it. This popular Mediterranean aperitif is identified as a uniquely Greek traditional drink, much like vodka represents the Russian culture. It is believed that ouzo was first created from copper stills on the island of Lesvos, where it is still mass produced today. Others believe it ouzo was a version of tsipouro distilled by monks on Mount Athos, but flavored with anise—a flowering plant with a mild licorice taste. Ouzo is a transparent liquid (with a minimum of 37.5% proof alcohol content) as clear as water; however, when water is added to ouzo, it turns cloudy white. Many Greeks drink ouzo straight, with ice, or as shots either before or after a meal. Ouzo is also popular with appetizers known in Greek as "mezedes." Tsantali is one of Greece's most popular brands of ouzo.

Tsipouro
Tsipouro is another custom Greek drink, the forerunner of ouzo, containing a minimum of 45% alcohol by volume. Tsipouro is a referred to as a "pomace brandy," which is distilled from the pressed grape remnants following traditional winemaking. Tsipouro has the distinction of being made by 14th century Greek Orthodox monks from Mount Athos, much like the creation of Cappuccino (coffee) is credited to the capuchin ("hood-wearing") monks of Italy. Tsipouro has the same liquid transparency of ouzo and also turns cloudy white when water is added. There is, however, one or two differences between tsipouro and ouzo—tsipouro usually lacks the anise flavor and is sipped straight from shot glasses due to its strong alcohol content. Tsipouro also has the same dubious reputation of moonshine since many amateur distillers seek to make their own unlicensed versions high in the mountains of the Greek mainland.

Retsina
Retsina is a dry white wine with a history of production and human consumption no less than 2,000 years in the Mediterranean region. Retsina's flavor comes from tree resins, particularly those of local Aleppo pine trees. The pine resin may give it a slightly yellowish hue. Retsina is popular in Attica, the area in and around Athens. For wine connoisseurs, retsina is an acquired taste and is much less sweeter than internationally renowned wines from France and Italy. Some may even consider retsina solely as a table wine—with 10 to 12% alcohol content—good enough to be enjoyed with dinner.

My dear mortals, before I depart this Delta Tau Chi fraternity party in my white and golden Greek key trimmed toga, I must ask a question of you. What is your favorite–*hiccup*–adult beverage? Post a comment and describe for me the one drink you could not live without. And if you are curious as to the social significance of your preferred potable, then simply visit this Men's Health article for more information on what your drink order says about you.

Bottoms up!